199 - Astro

Go to outer space they said

You’ll have a lovely trip

I thought this was a great idea

But for one relationship

It turns out I miss gravity

The thing that holds me down

I find it hard to eat my lunch

It’s all over my space gown

And don’t get me started on the loo

I have to use a suction pump

It’s hard to take a piss in space

Let alone a dump

And sleeping is quite difficult

You don’t know which way is up

I wake myself with a start

The Commander asks “Wassup?”

I try to tell him, this ain’t for me

But he just laughs it off

But I’m going to say I’m I’ll

I’ll fake a nasty cough

They’ll soon be keen to see me go

They won’t want me around

And I can wave them all goodbye

And get back on the ground

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From a Facebook challenge by Gary GCoyote.

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This poem appears in the book World’s Bestest Poetry Volume Two, available from the Shop!