103 - Mates
A friend of mine once robbed a bank
And drove away in an army tank
Tried to cross a river, but he sank
The smell afterwards was pretty rank
Another friend he had a gun
Tried to aim it at the sun
Went totally blind but not to be undone
Drove a Ferrari in Formula One
And then there was my mate Pete
Lots of things he liked to eat
Like metal, plastic and concrete
Although I think he used to cheat
Many of us have our own strange ways
Of doing things in these troubled days
Me? I like to make up shit
One day I’ll tell you ‘bout my mate Schmidt
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This poem appears in the book World’s Bestest Poetry Volume One, available from the Shop!